Oh, and I almost forgot, I would like to have all the flooring in our home replaced with that fluffy white carpet that all the toddlers play on in the Pottery Barn catalog. Thank you. That is all.
My family is filthy. My American Girl image and fluffy white carpet will only last for one day. Then, the day after Christmas, everyone will stop calling me Ivy. The dog, guinea pigs, or one of the various children will crap, pee, and/or vomit on my fluffy white carpet and I will take off with McKenna in my sky-blue 1974 Volkswagen Beetle. Sorry Julie and Kit. McKenna's a cheaper date. She's also a gymnast and I just really adore her leggings. Save the eagles.
All italicized excerpts in the first paragraph are taken from the American Girl doll catalog. I could never come up with those descriptions on my own. The only descriptive words I have for my clothing, bed, shower, van, and stove are used, sleep able, soap scummed and hairy, not all door locks work, and black. Thank you. That is all.
My Faces of Filth
Disclaimer: While all faces may not appear filthy, I assure you, filth was involved before and after each photo was taken.