Reasons Why I Am Cool

I had no idea what Gangnam Style was until a week ago.  Lillian came home doing this crazy dance, after a sleepover with nanny.  I had no idea where this dance came from, only that Lil and nanny thought it was hilarious.  I thought they made it up.  Lil called it Gangnam Style.  I didn't think much of it until one night I asked Sean what the hell it was.  He dragged me down to the computer and had me watch the video. I felt so...uncool.  My five year old is cooler than me.  And so is my mother.  How can this be?  I had to make a list.  So I would remember, why I am cool.

Reasons Why I Am Cool

1. I can go to the bathroom with a child sitting on my lap. 
2. My cell phone flips open.
3. I've never paid for a pair of underwear.  Thanks mom...and Victoria's Secret Underwear of the Month club.
4. I write blog posts about dog poop.  For money.
5. I can eat an entire pound of bacon.  Two if it's a holiday.
6. I can run fast.  And skate even faster.
7. I can catch my kids.  All three at the same time if I trip two of them.
8. I eat spinach every morning for breakfast.  That's how I have the strength to trip my kids.
9. I know how to ask "May I go to the bathroom?", in Spanish.
10. My all time favorite movie is National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.
11. I still remember how to read. 
12. I wear Converse sneakers.  In three different colors.
13. I've almost mastered indoor stair sledding.  All my idea.
14. I'll never wear skinny jeans.  Ever. My butt is too cool for those. 
15. I can shit, shower, and shave faster than Sean. 
16. I can do just about anything one handed. 
17. I'm the mom.  And I said so.

So maybe they are all cooler than me.

The cool crew.

You look cool to me mom!

Mom's trying to be cool again.  I have no idea who she is.